Posts

To err is human. But now, you must apologize.

Sheila was backing out of her parking space, at the grocery store and accidentally hit another car. Bob screamed at his boss, for making him work late on Friday night, date night. Karla was gossiping, about a colleague, via email and accidentally sent the toxic message to the person, she...

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Are you Sorry??

Are you sorry? Then avoid these traps when apologizing. Barbara was tired that Friday afternoon at work, and she looked forward to going home, putting on her pajamas, and spending the evening watching TV. But just before quitting time, Lucy dropped by Barbara’s desk. Lucy was lonely. She asked could she come over for...

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Survey

Dear Reader, I am constantly thriving to provide what my blog readers, clients and therapists want on these pages. I would appreciate your feedback on what you would like see on here and my Facebook page. It is a really short survey and should take not more than 5 minutes of your time. I...

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Grab Control of Chronic Stress — Your Body will Thank You

Grab Control of Chronic Stress

When Joanie first came to see me, she seemed like a person in total control. She had a lucrative law practice, a loving husband, three adorable children. Nevertheless, she was recovering from her third pounding headache in as many days. When I asked if anything in particular was worrying her,...

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Beating up on yourself this holiday season? Stop! Give yourself the gift of self-compassion.

gift of self-compassion

Amelia, a struggling young actress, plopped down on my sofa. She’d never been to see a therapist before, but she had to find out why she was so depressed. “I’m a great daughter and a great friend,” she told me. “When the people I love are down or in trouble,...

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Mending fences: How to heal shredded relationships after a damaging presidential election

empathy and the election

Rob and Mary have supported each other through health crises, career ups and downs, the raising of five children. But even they have one subject that they cannot discuss without thoughts of divorce —America’s 2016 presidential election. The Hamptons and the Smiths have always been great neighbors. Until that Saturday...

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Attachment styles — the ties that bind or break

Attachment Styles

Little Betty loved her parents. And while they loved her, too, they didn’t seem to have time for her. They were always rushing. They were always running out the door. Betty learned to get their attention. But she had to tug on their clothing, wrap her arms around their legs...

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Could it be me? When our own fears and hurts threaten our relationships.

threaten our relationships

“We are never so vulnerable as when we love, and never so hopelessly unhappy as when we lose the object of our love.” ~ Sigmund Freud Haley met Eric on a sunny day while they were sitting outside enjoying Sunday brunch. Everything about him got her attention: his looks, his choice...

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Be kind to yourself — blaming, shaming and criticizing never help

Be kind to yourself

When Grace entered individual therapy as an adult, she told me a story that dated back to her first day of kindergarten: She had felt terrified that morning. The classroom was so big. The teacher was so stern. Grace’s mother understood and tried to offer comfort. But already the teacher...

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Don’t let betrayal poison your marriage

betrayal

Julie and Eric were just work friends, but they started eating lunch together in the office cafeteria. Julie loved talking to Eric. He was a great listener, and he gave her excellent work advice, too.  Over time, Julie started comparing Eric to her own husband, Paul, who didn’t seem nearly...

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